Thursday, March 31, 2011

Hayden and I are leaving yeah that's right. We are going to be traveling to L.A to visit family, sadly David won't be joining us until later when he can take some vacation. But we are going train, which absolutely heart. Especially since a certain toddler is big enough to appreciate it and call it exciting this time. Hayden and I have been on trips twice since his birth. He did super on both but you and both know now that the toddler years are here it will be ten times different! In fact I am nervous about keeping the little firecracker in his seat... Without tears! I wonder I can strap him in his car seat? I need major tips on traveling with a toddler- major! This will be an experience for sure.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Self Portrait

From the moment I got my DSLR Hayden has held a great fascination for it. He had a good habit of taking and snapping pictures my point and shoot too. I try to not endorse his passions in the camera because of fear of him scratching my lens. But he got a hold of my remote while the camera was my tripod and started snapping.

These beauties are from about a week back and all SOOC, straight out of the camera.

He used the remote that was in his hand

These he took today without a remote but by pressing the shutter release running back to where I stood posing then running back to press it again.


Beginnings and Whatnot

I recently started reading Bryan Peterson's "Understanding Digital Photography." I was drawn to him through many recommendations on his book "Understanding Exposure." I ended up going to his website, viewed some of his photos and fell in love. I am enthralled deeply by his use/love of color. As a lover of colors that "pop" too, he is easily one of my favorite photographers.
Anywho, I am using his book as one of many learning tools - you never can have too much knowledge. But photography is a visual art, is it not? So what fun is it just reading a photography book? You have to get out there and experience it, or at least that is how I read photography books. With each lesson learned, I experience snapping my own. So I quickly had a light bulb moment, thinking I can turn this into even more fun...
By posting my "Lesson learned" photos. The plan is to post weekly about a certain subject learned, be it apertures, focus, noise, or shutter speed. There will be a picture of it.

P.S don't be afraid to join in. I have no linky but everyone is welcome, its not really a challenge but you can still hope in, and do it too.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011


Hayden was born almost completely bald with only light red and brown wisps on his head. And fast forward until now and he finally has enough hair so that I can't allow him to run about outside without doing something with his little mane. Today I bathed him, knowing outside play was coming up and decided to do a little more with it and brushed it abit and...
Result: Hayden posting deliciously for the camera.
Hmm this tot is a keeper.

Down for the Count

Hayden is still down sick. Ugh! It sucks. I'm exhausted, he's tired, restless and can't understand why he doesn't feel as energetic as usual. Finally on Sunday the rain lifted, leaving depressing, cloudy skies that Hayden begged me to go out in. But today was gorgeous, sunny with slight breezes. I really felt as if I was at the beach or something. We played outside, sick, exhausted, and all! It was too beautiful not to, and as soon as Hayden spotted the sun, gazing out the window, looking at the sun reflect on his fingers, he started begging. Soooo, I caved.

Him and his spray bottles!

"Does water really come out of this thing?"

"Oh, if Mommy only knew!"

"Hey, Mom, the plant is kinda dry, I can help you out with that."

Maybe the sun rays will cure my baby boy. Hmm, actually I think it is juice. So I have cut out juice. HAHAHA! Yes! Well, I will see how he does.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Our Week In Iphone Pics

Our week was a rainy one. It rained cats, dogs, and golden puppies here. It even teased some days with the sun coming out strong, beaming its warm rays down upon you just to quicky be invaded with clouds and rained on. It even struck up small balls of hail. But today was only overcast, cold, and depressing. Hayden suddenly was struck down with sickness after my last post declaring my happiness that he wasn't sick, but maybe I was. HMPT! If only. The little guy has been throwing from both ends, sleepy every hour or so, not feeling like playing around much but still trying to hang in there. Me, I'm exhausted, defeated, and feeling so sorry for him. Because I don't have time really to collage these they are all loose but in order. Srry but I need to go change Hayden's diaper. Also sorry if my posts are hit and miss, but I really won't have much time until Hayden gets better. I would love advice on it because I am scared of him getting dehydrated. He isn't taking anything really, maybe some fruit here and there but really nothing. He won't even drink.

Coloring outside

Stealing twizzlers and trying to share them because he got caught

Mommy/Baby picture- look I'm actually in a picture!!

Rain, Rain go away

Finding new shops to look at, LOVE IT

Playing with his best friend, who is my best friend's daughter

Thinking he's cute singing on the mic, while showing off his body lol

Adventures in clothing. Hayden has begun to want to put on clothes all by his lonesome. 8/10 it turns out like the above.

Adventures at Barnes and Noble again

In the shoes that I wouldn't let him play outside (We had to hide them because he kept putting them on oh brother, does he need a lesson in fashion)

Thursday, March 24, 2011

How could this be?

I looked back onto this blog recently and realized that I don't have many pictures of Hayden on his blog. How could this be? I am picture taking Mama, so what has happened? And wow has this place been stale! My stats must be dropping like flies, no cute anecdotes or chronicles of Hayden's shenanigans. You guys have missed so much! I know I have been busy with a little thing called life and the blog has been getting neglected. But I really need to make time, some time to at least post up some pictures or something to keep this thing going.
Lately I have been tired, Hayden has well been Hayden. Glad that he has had no sickies lately, but I feel myself coming down with something. Hayden right now is the ghost that won't wake up from sleeping all night and it's 10am here! Yup, that is forever sleep. I am hoping that I can get in some crafts with my little guy, I have so many ideas that I could burst I have been waiting for this for a VERY long time. I took a link from Morgan for the Artful Parent. I am over the moon thankful for the link.
Anyway, I'm sorry for the lag on my part, and such non creativity. Will be back refreshed soon with some great posts hopefully.

Sexy Tripod, hubba hubba

A couple of weeks ago, I thrifted a tripod. Yup, what luck? It was lightweight but still sturdy, old definitely but usable, and only 8 bucks. The release mount was gone but I wasn't worried, thinking oh I can buy one over the internet. Well, umm, nope after a 2 day internet search I found out the maker had gone out of business and chances of getting a mount was slim to Ebay at a maybe. I'm persistent though and earlier this week following dinner between bathing a toddler and putting him to bed, I decided to try a DIY project. Couldn't hurt. I hadn't not done DIY in a while, and I usually am all about DIY. I love the experience, the knowledge and cheap thrill of making things yourself, crafty, creative, just plain cool.
I had paid only 8 bucks on it so I didn't care about the money but if I was going to drop loads on money on a good tripod because this is I couldn't use that one, it wasn't going to be anytime soon, I would research the crap out of it to get the one I needed! And I was itching to get a tripod. So after charging my dead drill and putting Hayden to sleep, the hubby and I set to work. Within thirty minutes we has mount simply by using another mount from a smaller, less usable tripod. I wasn't sure if it would be too stable at first but after snapping a few pictures that night at low shutter speeds are in low lighting and still being able to use a low ISO, which is the last thing I try to up. I love it at 100 and cringe if I'm forced above 400. I just don't like noise, I know some noise on some are great in a creative sense.
For those of you who don't have a tripod, get one! It can do so much for your photos and stretch creativity. Lots of people talk of lenses, yes they are important, but you can get so much more from your lens, apertures, and shutter speed with a tripod. It is a must have! I love it. I plan on taking some time to edit some pictures I took last night following a blackout. I am a candle lover BIG TIME and thankfully because we lit our house up like the fourth of July, resulting in some interesting warm light, shadows, and flickering flames. I experimented big time with white balance, long shutter speeds, various apertures, I was in beginner heaven. I can't wait to find a block of time to play with them even more in Photoshop see what comes out. Until next time...


Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Thrifted and Gifted

I have been seeing a few blogs posting Stepping out Saturday or doing kind of what I'm wearing today posts and decided to join in. You'd be surprised at how much of my stuff is either thrifted or gifted believe it or not. HEHE. More because I am really cheap than anything else and thrift stores are like gold mines when it comes to antiques, which make my heart go pitter patter, and some great digs for super, super, slap me because I can't believe this low prices. Mama didn't raise no fool.

Me ruining a perfectly good dress by wearing it w/ sweats. Comfy.

I just thrifted this really awesome dress a few weeks ago but alas it has been too cold to wear it. I couldn't wait and decided at least I can wear it inside. Not what the toddler had planned. The sun came out, Hayden noticed and immediately started to pull on me for me to take him outside. I caved and the above picture is the result: My fabulous dress w/ sweats because it was too cold for tights or leggings.

I ended up wearing this.
Shirt: DD's Discount (warehouse type store)
Jeans: So old I don't know where I got them from, hence the rip in the knee and the faded look All from overuse.

These are NOT made for walking. But they are a killer in the looks department. And I didn't have to pay for them! Yay for free. They were gifted by a cousin, who has been having a thing for shoes for years, I get most of my shoes from her. Expect for my Vans or DCs. I think she got them from Payless could be totally wrong. This is my first wearing them, I got them months ago.

I am starting to really have a thing for shoes. What is happening to me?

One last picture of the shoes that are killing my calves. Beauty is pain -OW!- right?

A few words....

Hayden is becoming such a terrible delight to have around. Not that he wasn't a delight before it's just that now he can interact more and is just plain more fun. When I look at him now, I see a kid or toddler 100% in him - No baby at all! He is trying to do more stuff for himself, he can do more stuff for himself. He is back to himself in his "try, try, try again" mind state, which I love but when it comes to disobeying it can be killer on me to chase him around or have to continuously remove him. His tantrums, where he calmly lies himself down and begins to kick and scream, are narrowing down a bit, but he still has a hard time listening. Instead, I have to remove him and remove, redirect, or tell him "you can't play with this but that." They all never work all the time, but one out of all them usually works for him.
Hayden's persona is coming out more, and I'm really starting to see who he is. And truly love him for who he is. His interests are shaping, his moods are stabilizing more as I understand him more, his limits, boundaries, likes, and dislikes.
He enjoys instruments (so for his b-day I plan on letting it rain music), he is getting more artistic and drawing is one of our favorite together activities besides reading and singing. (I am gonna have to post a video of this kid singing, he totally has soul). He loves trucks and trains, so I'm thinking about maybe getting him that Thomas train track thing or maybe that village table.
And what I'm excited the most to share is: Hayden can talk! It started earlier in his 21st month with a few new words popping up about every so often, and now has peaked! He can say certain sentences, piece words together and has been learning between 1-2 words a day. I am so excited about him talking, I really am starting to become happy that he is growing up. VERY HAPPY. And here is a video of not even a fraction of the words he knows. Enjoy, I know I love videos

Shooting in Raw



I am really new to Photoshop CS5 and new to photo editing in general, but I guess I am learning pretty well. I shot in raw and man oh man if you don't you really, really have to try it. At first you don't think that, yeah, its not that much different. But when it comes to editing it makes ALL THE DIFFERENCE.
I adjusted the exposure, making the photo brighter by taking away some shadows. I messed with the brightness, barely slide down the contrast and added a little more saturation. And I'm done.

*Note I did all this in the Raw editor that comes up when you shot in Raw and simpy saved. I don't think that you can change the exposure on a JPEG. I could be wrong.*

Touch Up Tuesday's at the Paper Mama

Monday, March 21, 2011

Day 24: Your Last five Facebook Status'

Dear rain who are u to replace my sunny weather? GO AWAY I wanna go to woodward park

hdandmb's photo
Dear rain who are u to replace my sunny weather? GO AWAY I wanna go to woodward park
6 hours ago via Instagram

Caught red handed now u want to share

hdandmb's photo
Caught red handed now u want to share
7 hours ago via Instagram

I am an aunt I am an aunt I am an aunt I am an aunt

hdandmb's photo
I am an aunt I am an aunt I am an aunt I am an ain't
March 14 at 3:04pm via Instagram

Why u never leave a tot alone for a sec

hdandmb's photo
Why u never leave a tot alone for a sec
March 8 at 12:55pm via Instagram ·

We have been having power outages all day No power= No tweets, and its raining something awful here but I like the rain
February 25 at 3:59pm via yoono

The Situation

Okay, I love my apartment. It feels like home. I have two walk in closets, over 970 sq ft. to ourselves, open floor plan, W/D hook ups, pretty good neighborhood, lots of trees to love and hug, and cheap rent less than 800 a month. In the year since I moved in here, I have not been pleasured with the choice of people that the apartment is letting in. It is no surprise that lately, I have gotten wind of several break ins, and sometime late last year we got ourselves a new neighbor, who shady at best. It has gotten to the point that I hate leaving my house unattended. When I do coming home, I hold my breath, my eyes scanning my apartment to see any signs of a break in. I hate coming home. And instead of having my usual feeling of "Home sweet home" I have been greeted by holding my breath, thinking maybe some thief has made off with my hard earned stuff. Plus the management has started to turn into class A B!t^#es. Doing sudden inspections when I have not realized any notice, then when I complain they act like they did put a notice up. Ummm, yeah, right. That is a total invasion of my privacy, and annoying. Thus it has been in my heart to move for a very long time, it's just hard to say I'm gone when I have a toddler to think about.
But with my family deciding to leave to Los Angeles, Ca from Fresno, I have been invited. I don't know if I want to go, okay, yeah I want to be near my family. It has been only a few days and I'm going crazy. Them moving has put many things into perspective such as why stay in a place making you miserable, slowly bringing you down? We could go to L.A, literally starting over, which is not bad considering. Who wouldn't want to start all over? Fresh. New. But with "fresh" and "new" comes uncertainty and leaps of faith mixed like untested fresh paint that you could hate.
Then there is the option of staying in Fresno. My best friend has offered for us to come live with her, which usually isn't a great option because we would be room mating, not that I'm against it, it's just that Hayden would lose his room.
I know we could simply move into another apartment, which I really don't want, I am hoping for a condo or townhouse, while praying for a house next.
But moving down south isn't all bad, nor is moving in with my friend because David has the option of finding a new job, great in my book. The job he has pays the bills and he makes a pretty good amount but the hours and people he has to deal with on a regular basis is killing him. He really wants CHP but since Cally is broke, they are not hiring (California's budget crisis is HORRIBLE for those of you who don't already know). After talking to them they are hoping that by the Summer of this year but it could be all the way next year. In the meantime, he does have other jobs options. The catch 22 of his current job is he can't look for work when his hours are so bad. When would he have time for a job interview?
It's all a headache and lots to time about in such little time. Still, I trust deeply in God's path and believe this is something bigger than me. I just have one of those feeling that I sometimes get, never follows and it turns out to be right. Well, this time I have learned my lesson. I know I need to move, it's just hard to close my eyes and free fall. I am a planner, who worries and wants all the details after all.

Sunday, March 20, 2011


On Saturday, I was supposed to join in on Stepping Out Saturday. But I just couldn't. My family left for L.A. on Saturday. I affected me more than I ever thought to know that they will no longer be a 15 mile drive away. That I will not see my niece grow up like in front of me but in distance pictures and captured moments. They will be back one last time in April to do some finalizations on some things before leaving for the City of Lost Angels again.
I saw them off and went straight to bed not getting up until I couldn't sleep anymore but was still unable to move. I am realizing how much this is going to suck. I have lots to moving to be with them or even starting over here. I have so much to write about just not the energy. I will try to write some more later on my apartment situation later. But for now, I am going to check out a condo. Just a drive by and look nothing major.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Daddy and son

I know I harbor Hayden all to myself most of the time he is my little boy and he's hard to share. And while David and Hayden have always had a great father/som relationship, it still melts my heart seeing them do their male bonding and have their things together that Mommy just can't seem to do as good as Daddy. It is wonderful to prepare dinner or load the dishwasher without worrying about Hayden all alone in his room getting into trouble because he is racing cars on Daddy's back.

I'm lovin' it.

The things Dr. Sears never told me...and other things about motherhood

That toddlers will refuse to eat food from the plate you served them instead expecting you to share with them from your plate. And when you try to direct them back, they throw you the most cutest eyes you've hear seen and says "share?"

That toddlers will politely get down on the floor, lay still for a second as if getting together themselves or pumping themselves up for the moment before kicking, screaming, and riving on the floor as dying from the flesh eating virus. And all you can do is look.

Or that your toddler will need a nap as you upgrade your phone to an Iphone, and your husband forgets his wallet, leaving you in the AT&T with a toddler as he darts clear across town to get it. As the toddler goes into overdrive, he chases another toddler around the store, who is afraid of him, darts behind the employee desks, laughing all the way HO-HO-HO, all with his mother trailing behind him. After she finally catches him, she attempts to hold him as he decides to do his best impersonation of spagetti, trying to slide through her arms. She takes business cards to distract him, which he promptly chucks at the associate with the arm of Barry Bonds. The cards miss the lady simply because she ducked.

Or that I would be THAT mom with THAT toddler in an AT&T store, who only can hold her toddler by the arm as he tries everything in his 3 feet 27lb arsenal to break her hold. Or that I would THAT mom with THAT toddler who gets the stares from hell as hes arched his back, melted to the floor, screamed, hitting notes that Whitney Houston could only dream of, like I was a serial killer.

Or that toddlers remember everything, watch everything even the things you don't think you do, and do it later. The good, the bad, and the ridulously cute. They are jacks of all trades with muliple personality disorder and a firm sense what they don't like and do like, and if they are confused they are going against you just to test you. And wrapped up in their chaos and daredevil ways is the best damn thing in the world: them.

or that I would love Hayden so much that he would become such a part of me not as just his mom but a friend, a playmate, someone to seek guidance from, to call when he is scared in trouble and everything else in between. And after not nursing for months now, still remember that breast have milk and try to sneak a nurse in the middle of the night.

2, two, and II

In 2 days Hayden will be 22 months, and in two months Hayden will be II.

Yup, and I am sad to report that for this tot as with early thing, the terrible two's have appeared,rearing their ugly head like a raging cat in heat with the stubborness of a bull. On good Hayden is filled with love, hugs, and Oscar winning tantrums and a smirk for the ladies. And on the bad ones, well, I just hang my head and hold on for the ride other wise I know I will be thrown off.

And its amazing because this still is my favorite stage.

Day 23: Something you crave for...a lot

Hmmm, a new lens for my Dslr I am really starting to get "Lens Lust." I heard it would set in but I really want me a tripod and a bag too. So yeah, I crave photography equipment a lot. I want to wait to learn more about what's what and other stuff before I buy anymore.

Friday, March 18, 2011

Day 22: what makes you different from everyone else

hmm, this a question, I really have to think about because I have lots of things that I think are weird and really feel as if I am the only one who does this but am surprised time and time again that someone else does the same thing.

I collect cans, I don't mean I just care about the environment. I have collected cans since I was a child before everything became eco friendly. It was simply something you did to put a few extra coins in the house for hard times, or a savings.

I collect paper and pens, not intentionally but more by I really like notebooks, lead pencils, and pens, so everything I am in a store and see one that is really cool or that I must have I buy, and it really adds up.

I over analyze everything. Period. Everything is getting broken down, dissected, placed back together, taken apart again and pieced together differently just so I can know everything about it.

I like to know everything about everything. Its not that I think I am a know it all I just simply want to know because it really ticks me that I don't. I love information.

I have always like old things from music, to clothes, to house hold items. If you know me, you know that I would pick up an old book from 1777 just for the looks before I would a brand new shiny book. Antiques are always a choice, and find myself frequently heading down to Old Town Clovis' many antiques shops to daydream and window shop. I have a fascination with the Tudors and their era. I studied extensively on it and was very pleased when Showtime premiered the The Tudors. I also love, love the Victorian era. I love Victorian and Tudor dresses, corsets, and the entire shebang! I just love the look of older fashion. I love the look of the old days and in love with the idea being in the 50's wearing poodle sweaters and skirts, or the way the 70's brought the most brilliant and greatest musicians and music the world had ever seen. Everything seemed nice, bright, filled with innocence and naive. the classic looks of Audrey Hepburn, Dorothy Dandridge, and Marilyn Monroe or the sexiness of James Dean in his leather jacket and loner/bad boy image, and/or the playfulness of John Travolta and Johnny Depp impersonating those times in Grease or Cry Baby. Or the love stories that made you envy that guys can be such blatant jerks in this day and age, not that King Henry the 8Th was a Saint. I just love anything and everything old, from every era! I think this comes from my Grandma, who raised me. And one of the reasons I get along with my MIL so well because she is the same way. They make dreams and fairy tales in my mind. Little did I know that there are hundreds if not millions out there with the same love.

But I guess that one person can like or do one thing the same, even several but I guess what makes me unique is that no person is ever going to be exactly like me.

Day 21: A picture of something that makes you happy

Double meaning here. I heart books. They are accountable for about 80% of the daydreaming I do because it really takes me off into another world. I am big reader because of this. I have had days err nights were I'm on the phone late at night talking to my bestie about a book and characters in a book as if they are REAL people. I chose this picture because it is a picture of photography books, which also makes me happy. VERY happy.

Daydream Wonderland...

Hmm, there is something that is so cute and breath taking about a sleeping child...

And unlike most parents I almost no pictures of Hayden sleeping because it would take a parent braver than I to sneak in his room and start firing off my camera with the flash on to take pictures of Hayden. He'd wake up just from me focusing.

Tonight though I picked up my fancy handy dandy Point and Shoot camera (someone has been watching too many cartoons), tried out a DIY filter for the flash on your p&s, complements of Jess @ Irocksowhat. With the flash a big muffled by a piece of paper towel (I have a Canon Powershot 1400, which super duper small, so when I say a piece I mean a piece), I felt a little better about playing creeper in my son's bedroom.

I wish I had the guts to take off the paper towel in order to compare but I am a wimp, but I do notice a dreamy effect that would not be there w/o the paper towel. I will be trying this out a little more in the future

Umm, Also in other news, I have started my own blog. Yup, It really has nothing on it yet because I have not had time to fix it up but check it out follow it you'd like I will do another post once everything is complete to my liking and stuff. I decided about a week ago to make another one just for me instead of doing blogging for both Hayden and I on this site. I really felt as if I was imposing and started hating posting I really want to keep this for Hayden and for those who want to see him, know him, and about motherhood in general. So I made my own. It is called Daydream wonderland. One of the reasons, it took me so long to even make it was I wanted a title that I would really to enjoy and could keep. After experimenting with a few I was mopping my floor late last night when I started daydreaming (or rather night dreaming)once I pulled myself out, I silently scolded myself for always living in my head and daydreaming. I countered with my mind is my wonderland and quickly thought of Daydream Wonderland. So there you have it my blog is Daydream Wonderland: a place for all those thoughts and other random stuff in my life with Hayden and David.